Belief, country, and conscience...

What determines your country of allegiance.  Is it the colour of your skin? Or the beliefs that dwell within you? Is it your up bringing? Or could it be a conscience decision made based on logic?

This is the problem that creeps up on me.

It seems that I’m forever defending the Chinese way of life to my aussie mates, yet in the same breath, I’m forced to justify my aussie way of life to my chinese friends.  When you belong no where, and is constantly attacked for your beliefs, it’s hard to know where your heart truly lies.

So, is it your heritage that marks you as a person of a tribe, or is it the upbringing and personal thought that makes you part of the group?  What if those two are in conflict?  Which side would you pick?  What would be more important to you.

Even though these questions I ask myself.  The truth of the matter is I don’t know.  I will forever go on been me.  Standing up for what I believe in, and protecting what I consider mine.  I have been fortunate enough that these two have not yet decided to play the cruel joke of colliding, yet I know that the day will come, when my own children decides to ask the same questions.  When I do not even know the answer, when I do not even know my self in this respect, how will I face up to the innocent voice of a child, how will I find the heart to teach something I do not 100% believe in.

It seems that every step I take, and find out a little more about myself, the more questions I ask.  Why can’t my thirst for knowledge be quenched, and when will it listen to my demands, and stop its seeking… I guess only time will know.